Giving and Taking in a Community - All Things Product Podcast with Teresa Torres & Petra Wille

Listen to this episode on: Spotify | Apple Podcasts

In this episode of All Things Product, Petra Wille and Teresa Torres dive deep into an increasingly relevant (and occasionally frustrating) topic: how people show up in communities—and whether they’re showing up to give or to take.

From in-person meetups and Slack groups to book signings and LinkedIn interactions, Petra and Teresa explore the subtle (and not-so-subtle) differences between authentic contribution and self-serving behavior. They share personal stories, real-world examples, and some tough love about what it really means to engage meaningfully.

If you've ever wondered how to grow your network, become a sought-after speaker, or simply be a better community member—this one’s for you.

Topics Covered

  • The Trend That Sparked This Episode: Petra flags a shift she’s noticing: more folks joining communities asking, “What can I get?” instead of, “How can I help?”

  • Why Communities Matter: The unexpected long-term benefits of engaging in a community—and how the payoff often comes years down the road.

  • The Origin Story of Petra & Teresa’s Connection: A short, enthusiastic conference interaction leads to years of collaboration and friendship.

  • What Giving Actually Looks Like: The difference between offering value and unsolicited advice. (Spoiler: one builds trust, the other breaks it.)

  • Behind the Scenes of Conferences & Course Communities: How Petra and Teresa handle entitlement, scholarship requests, and volunteering—and why the approach matters.

  • Online Community Behavior: From Slack spamming to thoughtful sharing: how to show up well in digital spaces.

  • Choosing Where to Engage: Why less is more when it comes to online communities—and how to pick the right ones for deeper involvement.

  • Mentorship, Giving at Any Level, and the Power of Small Gestures: Even a thank-you note or recipe can go a long way. Giving isn’t transactional—it's relational.

Key Takeaways

  • Give before you ask. Community thrives when people contribute without - expecting immediate returns.

  • Quality > quantity. You don’t need to be everywhere—just pick a few communities and show up consistently.

  • A little effort goes a long way. Whether it's sharing your learnings or offering to help, even small contributions can lead to big connections.

  • Be mindful of timing and tone. Offering value is great—unless it’s delivered like a sales pitch or advice no one asked for.

  • Communities remember generosity. Years later, people still remember who offered help, not who just wanted the mic.

Resources & Links:

Mentioned in this episode:

Petra Wille